Sticker Shock

Have you ever noticed that high-end items don’t have the price listed in plain sight? Having window-shopped in some of the most upscale boutiques in NYC, I know for the most part, the dollar amount  of a one-of-a-kind bag, bracelet or bauble isn’t listed at all. You have to inquire with a salesperson if you wish to buy it.  And most times if you have to ask, you can’t afford it.

  Luxury brands don’t send out coupons and the inventory hardly ever goes on sale.  How do I know? Eons ago (college days), I was into designer bags.Not that I was even on that level, but I was a trend-a-holic.  Now? Not so much.  Back then, I never received an email with printable coupons from the Louis Vuitton representative or a postcard from the nice lady at the Chanel  store telling me about a 75% off sale.

Though I was living wayyyy beyond my means, I knew what it cost to have those “nice” things.

The same goes for women. Trust me, the value of a designer  item  does not equate to a woman’s priceless worth. It’s a metaphor. I’m not referring to an actual price in currency. Okay? Keep reading.

Often times we’re taught through self-help books  written by men who have never had successful relationships and wear pimp suits  that in order to be happy and in a secure, healthy, happy relationship, we must prove ourselves to  the almighty men. I agree… to an extent. See, when you meet a guy, you BOTH have to find something intriguing, attractive, and valuable about one another. It’s not one-sided. He does not hold all power.

Never allow a man to make you think his y chromosome alone is reason enough for you to “show your tag”.  His mere existence as a man (who you may or may not find attractive, intelligent, and/or desirable) is no  excuse  for you to just put yourself on sale.


 You know your WORTH. (I hope you do. If not, learn more about the beautiful, precious creation God made when you were in your mother’s womb before you even accept a man’s advances.) A man will likely not want to hear you boast about your value, but he should be able to tell that you are of quality just by looking. Carry yourself in that priceless-I’m-worth-far-more-than-rubies kinda way.

Oh, and refrain from lowering your ticket price at the request of an interested party.

There’s no haggling done at Saks 5th Avenue.

Never ever, ever, ever, EVER bootleg your brand.

The moment you realize you’re not a discount item, you’ll stop advertising. Stop offering coupons. Even the most frugal consumer will pass up saving ten percent on something he’s not looking to buy.  The wise man takes his time while browsing the inventory for a specific item. This is not an impulse buy. Don’t worry, you’re unique; you’ll stick out.

 Once you catch his eye he’ll  determine if he can “afford” you or not. (Remember, you set your own price. – Your actions and reactions teach people how to treat you. Your standards should require reaching effort and not be attainable to the average joe. (who wants average when you can have great?) )

My definition of afford is this: “can he support you emotionally and spiritually, all while being the best man he can be for himself?”

•Note, I didn’t mention financially because dating doesn’t have to break the bank.*

Is he even worthy of your time?

What are his works? What is he doing with himself besides browsing?

As a man he should be able to hold his own. If he can’t take care of him why is he wasting his time trying to court you? Who’s going to pick up the slack? You?

Now, ladies, be sure that you’re not a counterfeit luxury item. Uphold the promises of your certificate of authenticity. Keep yourself in good condition. Maintain a standard of excellence.

Showing your value has everything to do with being who God created you to be. If you claim to be “fearfully and wonderfully made” (Psalm 139:14) then don’t carry yourself like you’re an assembly line item.  To be crafted with fear and wonder is simply AMAZE!

Sepia, What if he experiences sticker shock?

Hmmm. Good question.

What would you do if something you REALLY wanted and needed was more than you expected it to be? Save up, right?

Allow him a span of time prepare for you. Watch him closely. Is he checking in on the merchandise to be sure no one has bought it? Is he genuinely interested in you as a custom item?

When a salesperson sees your interest, they’re more likely to put something aside until you come back.

Am I telling you to put your life on hold until he’s ready? Not at all.

Keep your eyes open. There’s someone out there who is willing to make a hefty purchase no matter the price point.

So, I ask: Ladies, are our values evident (though hidden) or marked down and ready for the nearest buyer? Let’s talk about it.

*Just this weekend I went on a $2.oo date and it was the best EVER!!!

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2 thoughts on “Sticker Shock

  1. 2blu2btru says:

    This is a really good comparison. As I don’t do much shopping, and the only designer purse I own was bought for me, I wouldn’t have thought of this one. It’s true that many of us do “put ourselves on sale” for the man that we want to “purchase” us. I guess you could say all good quality things cost a significant amount of money, but not all things that cost a significant amount of money are good quality.

    Personally, I am a high quality, major purchase, and I market myself as such. Men who date me know I’m not going to accept all kinds of treatment or all forms of payment for my purchase. 😉 It’s also evident that mean know this: they either tell me they aren’t where they can afford me, they leave me alone, or they show they are an interested buyer and worth the time. I’ve “set aside” this particular item (i.e., I’m in a relationship with someone).

    Great post, as always. 🙂

  2. […] Just because you’re single doesn’t mean you have to date any and every man that asks you out. You will eventually come to the conclusion that when it comes to men, some simply deserve you. Which ones? Read “You Don’t Deserve Me…” to find out. A man should know that to take you off the market isn’t an inexpensive endeavor. Sepia Brown tells you what that means in “Sticker Shock.” […]

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