Category Archives: Random Blog

Random Blog #3

Hey!
I feel amazing. It’s a refreshing feeling. I’m not as tired as I once complained about and the feeling is priceless. BK is 3 months old! I can’t believe how fast the time is flying. She amazes me everyday. Seeing her smiling face (which looks nothing like mine) every morning is a blessing within itself. Some days I just want to stay at home with her and play all day long. Never have I known this kind of love.

I love being a mother. Though it took me a little while to embrace, I can actually say it’s the best feeling in the world. Last year around this time, I had just found out I was expecting. I was afraid and excited all at once. It was then that I began wrapping my mind around what it meant to bring forth life. What I have now is so much more than what I could even think of. (Ephesians 3:20 moment in full effect.)

I can remember being one of those women who bragged about NOT having children. I now chuckle when I read a status update that says something like: I’m glad I don’t have kids to tie me down.
Some women make the choice not to have children and that’s all fine and dandy. But my life didn’t have the same purpose that it does now that I have a child. Everything I do has an effect on her life. That’s so deep and intimidating at times. Even when talking about myself I have to remember that she’s watching and listening. I am her definition of what it means to be a woman. That’s so scary to me. I’ve been given a huge charge to mold and shape and be an example.

I take it day by day and I am confident that God has prepared me for every obstacle I’ll face in motherhood and life in general. Knowing that my strength comes from Him makes it so much easier. One thing I’ve learned in the past three months is that it gets better. When I brought her home from the hospital I had no idea what I was doing. I cried a lot. I spent a lot of time wondering if I would ever get the hang of things. Once my hormones leveled off and I treated her like a baby (instead of expecting her to be able to do everything on her own) I regained my composure.

I still don’t feel like my “old” self and that’s to be expected. I’m a different person with a new title: Fabulous Mommy! I embrace it and I know that being a mom doesn’t mean being perfect, but I’m working on it.

 

Motherhood: A Brand New Me

Motherhood: A Brand New Me

Until next time,
Be blessed & Live Well.

Chanell Nicole

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Random Blog #1 Friday. 2.15.12

Wow. I can’t believe it’s the second week in February already! I can see this year is going to fly by. Any-who, what’s new with me? (Besides every single day being a different adventure?) Oh, I gave up social media for the next 40-60 days. I need a way to clear my mind and focus on what’s really important right now: my God, my husband, my child, my goals.

(Wait, is blogging considered social media? Hope not. If so, this will be my cheat of sorts.)

 

I have been so consumed with tending to the wants and needs of a new baby that I feel like I have lost a bit of myself. Maybe I’m changing so much that I don’t recognize Chanell. Maybe this is the new me? Either way, I feel like I need to reconnect or re-meet myself.

 

These days I feel selfish for being tired. I feel even more selfish for being a tad bit frustrated at times at such a little, defenseless human being. I have apologized to the baby on two occasions for wanting more sleep. She can’t fend for herself. She needs me more than I need her. Am I wrong for wanting to do more with my day? Should I not want to go back to work?

 

My day-to-day routine has changed from: wake up, breakfast, tv, blog, internet, get dressed, go to work; to: wake up (by way of personal alarm clock/crying), breastfeed, rock back to sleep, stuff down breakfast, try not to fall asleep while looking for clothes to wear to mother in law’s house. Every day I realize in some way that my life has changed and will never go back to what it used to be. In some ways, that’s refreshing; in other ways, it makes me feel a bit trapped (maybe trapped is the wrong word but when you have to sit on the toilet with a newborn attached to your boob, tell me you don’t feel trapped!).

 

Don’t get me wrong, I love being married and I love my baby girl. I may be having a “greener grass” moment. I was so great at being a single woman, that I may have taken it for granted. Either way, I’m at a new place in my life and I must embrace the change. Hug it. Go with it. Love it.  Grow from it.

This is just like any other new role I have to assume. With it comes growing pains and adjustments. I’m finally realizing what patience really is. Especially since the baby refuses to take a pacifier or bottle (which is delaying my return to work). She’s on her own time (hello? she came almost 2 weeks after her due date) and I must respect that.

 

In respecting the process, I must remember that this time won’t be forever. I might even look back on it and laugh (will I?).

For now, I’ll continue to listen out for the cries of my demanding boss and take her orders with a smile (and maybe a few yawns).

 

Until next time, Live Well and Be Blessed.

 

Chanell Nicole ♥

 

P.S. – Since I’m fasting from all social media (Facebook, InstaGram, Twitter, etc) feel free to share.

 

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